Aspergers Mommy

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Well I am a mom of two wonderful kids that I have been blessed with!!! I am not a psychiatrist, or a doctor so anything I say is not the answer to all, it might not even be the right thing for me!! lol I do my best with who and what I have to overcome any challenge with lots and lots of prayer,my mom who is God given just to me for this very reason, my sisters, and friends! I love life, mostly positive........BUT I am insane at times, get to the point of wanting to explode! lol.. I sing kids songs way too much! Did I mention I am OCD when it comes to cleaning. Which believe it or not I think is what keeps me sane. When I clean, I love it. Breakdowns, crying, talking, just all seem to be ok as I clean..Thank God for OCD!!!

Friday, March 16, 2012

Aspergers, ODD...... I know I like zombies but i dont want to get bit!!! March 16, 2012

Happy Friday!!!!!

Happy almost St. Patrick's Day!!

I am so happy it is Friday I actually want to cry..........OK, maybe not that extreme, but close!!! Maybe it is cause my throat hurts........I don't know.. lol
I look cute in daddy's hat!!
 So, my throat hurts cause I had to get that test done where they put a camera in your stomach done yesterday.......I was a nervous wreck!!!!!! BUT, like they said, I don't remember NOTHING!!!  I don't know what I took but i need some of that on stand-by!!!!  You forget everything......I could so use that during a meltdown, or a particularly stressful time.. It would be so awesome to just say...........Go for it............Just drama queen it up cause I wont remember a thing in about ....  10.9. 8. 7........ And when I wake up i can pretend everything is awesome!!!!!!!!!!!  I think they need to market it!!!   Well, I think they have and I believe they call it the "date rape" drug, but i swear mine would only be for me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  lolol

NO, I do not condone any use of prescription drugs like that guys......... Just for me!  lololol

Anyway, so I was told i would do things I wouldn't remember, so I am glad i was alone after!!!!!!!!!  lol I once went to the kitchen and refrigerator was open..........NOPE don't remember opening it........  lolol Finally i sat my doped up bootay down on the couch and didn't get up in fear i might do something stoooopid and burn down the house or something....... Woke up feeling like I had been on WWE Raw!!!!!!!!!, but I am all good today.. It is a soft food day, I might need to go to the hospital and order the "I have no teeth" menu so my throat doesn't hurt  lololol

OK, so I know your DYING to know about my zombie comment in the title..........True I do like zombie movies, and with the support of my sub-human, Jalaine, I think we are prepared for a zombie attack  lolol
But, when I say I like them, it is not cause I like to get bit!!!!!!!!!

So it is 7:00 a.m. I am walking into babies room to wake her up for the day, I wake her and Samarra comes in and got excited about something............ Let me pause for a moment......... Seriously , there was nothing..I said nothing exciting.. the baby is half asleep.........But something got her excited....

She grabs my right arm and starts jumping up and down and puts her face into my arm and is making this HUGE cheese face and making some kind of noise.........Then it happened ..........She BIT me!!!! I screamed and knocked her away from me and said....... 

SAMARRA!  You bit me!!!!!!!!

She runs off screaming and crying right to the couch which is where she usually goes and puts the blanket over her head and pillow to her face screaming and rocking.........I went on with getting the baby ready......... Samarra starts in with the "I am not even worth breathing air", "Someone should just kill me now", which I HATE.........I know she is sorry......

OK, so I know she didn't do it on purpose, it just happened, but i was so confused on what to do, she got excited, she was not doing something wrong, but she bit me..........I had to call the therapist on this on..........I know........LAME.......... I don't even know what to do with my own child.............BUT.. she made a very good point.........

This is a VERY important life lesson to be learned here and there WAS a consequence for her biting..........What if I got excited at work and bit someone, what would happen??? I would get fired most likely........What if she bit someone at school for any reason, she might get suspended.......... So even though she was happy and excited, biting will get you a consequence..........

So even though I still kinda feel bad for her, I want her to grow emotionally and learn how all her actions will cause a reaction.......I did take away her iPod for a night and she did not like that at all.. But i did tell her that it was only to help her remember to not bite.. I know she was not being "Bad". Cause she was confused as well with the consequence.. she said... I wasn't mad or being mean, it just happened before I knew it...

So that statement can be two things..............Her really not "getting" it, or her trying to manipulate me and try and get out of the consequence...........Either way she still lost the iPod............

Why is it so hard to determine of a 7 year old child who is a master manipulator on when she is playin me or when she is serious??????????????  GGGGGGGGGRRRRRRRRR  And of course I am the best target, I am mommy, and want to hold them and love them and protect them and think they never do wrong!  lolol

Boy, is that way off huh????  lololol

Well other than that, we of course went through our normal week........I am not sure if I am getting worse, or if she is just deciding she doesn't mind repercussions. She is so quick mouthed when I say things.........I swear she doesn't have time to even think......So then I am right back in my state of confusion...

I think it has to do with the ODD stuff, she just HAS to at least attempt to do the opposite of EVERY thing you say..... Or say something about someone being sick, she laughs......tell her something exciting to me and she has no response what so ever!  I brought some clothes home that a co-worker had given me for the baby and when I went through them she was MAD and lashed out quite a few times at the baby and me to the point of me having to get on her and make her leave the room.............I am not a mean mom, in anticipation for just that I got Samarra some new summer clothes and I told her I had and we would go through them next........


Got done with babies clothes........Thank you Margaret for the clothes!!!!!!!!!!!!

Started getting Samarra's clothes out and called her in to see them as I got them out.........She showed NO interest at all......I am like honey, isn't this exciting...........She still acts as though nothing...........no emotio at all except 100% not interested.......I call her over to hold something up to her and she says.. I am playing my game i have to get to level........... whatever level it is..........

So , this is selfish, but I thought she might be happy a little, or say thank you...........I was kinda hurt...........Oh well.... I asked her if she liked her clothes and she said........I don't care........ But the whole time i was going through Siahna's clothes she was grabbing them and throwing them..............Whatever......

Guess what????????????  Yup it is that time.. I know it all went by so fast!!!!! I don't think I got my fill of the blog yet, but I must continue the day................WWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAA!!!

Why is it that sometimes we have to see others problems to realize ours are not so bad????????

SOOOOOOOOOOOO I will be that for you !!!! lolol....If you get confused this next week, smile cause most likely I will be more confused and I can be living proof that someone is worse off then you!!!!!!!!!!!!!  lolol I am just here to help..... I do what I can.. When I can........

Here are some pics from this week........

First off.. 
Remember Samarra on her "I am adopted kick" well lets just look at a few pics of me and her ..





NEED I SAY MORE????, I was even darker than her and well.. fatter too  lolol

The rest are random Siahna, she is a camera HOG these days!!!  lolol
Just adorable!!!  Have you ever seen a more round face???  lol

Gotta have a One-Eyed Jacks hat!!!!  Our little Sturgis girl.. lolol

I got what it takes!!!!!!!
 Have a great day!!!

1 comment:

  1. Hi Insane Mom, I love your post and the pictures are precious. I've started a new blog myself which I'd love for you to have a look at: www.thestoryofadvocacy.com.

    We Moms have to stick together. I hope you will find my blog to be very informative and helpful in advocating for children with special needs.

    I'd love to hear your thoughts.

    ReplyDelete