Aspergers Mommy

My photo
Well I am a mom of two wonderful kids that I have been blessed with!!! I am not a psychiatrist, or a doctor so anything I say is not the answer to all, it might not even be the right thing for me!! lol I do my best with who and what I have to overcome any challenge with lots and lots of prayer,my mom who is God given just to me for this very reason, my sisters, and friends! I love life, mostly positive........BUT I am insane at times, get to the point of wanting to explode! lol.. I sing kids songs way too much! Did I mention I am OCD when it comes to cleaning. Which believe it or not I think is what keeps me sane. When I clean, I love it. Breakdowns, crying, talking, just all seem to be ok as I clean..Thank God for OCD!!!

Friday, December 30, 2011

Aspergers?? ODD... "Santa" is INSANE!!! And yes.. It is all me.... Dec. 30, 2011

Happy Friday!!!

So my angel has been home for four days now, and I think breaks are BAD!!! My whole body is having to adjust to having her home!! My back hurts, my stomach is on a constant roller coaster and GUESS WHAT!!!

I think most of it is my fault!! I noticed from the second she got home I started catering to her to make sure the PEACE stayed in the house and I have worn myself out!!!!!!!!
Well I am not gonna keep it up, I am going to need a full time massage therapist and a psychologist, a pain doctor and a constant flow of grace and patients from God............OR I think the zombie effect is going to kick in again!!!!!!!!!

Some people tell me that I seem to be more of the problem then Samarra is and that I allow her too much lee-way and I love them for trying to find a solution for our things we deal with. But The one thing I have to remind people of is Samarra was the sole attention getter...Samarra has a HUGE need for attention, it must be pretty much constant and if not she MUST be doing something to entertain herself.

Now you say well sure some kids need more attention than others.. that's normal..........Yes it is.....Now take that and times it by 100 and you have Samarra.. That is when the ODD kicks in full force! The anger, the lashing out the evil eyes...Well you know what life does not revolve around her and she is going to have to learn that. If you ask my sub-human, Jalaine, She will tell you different lololol But I cant only pay attention to her, I have work, I have another baby, I have responsibilities at home.

So YES, I admit I am one of the problems......Bad mommy for bringing in the money from work and making sure food and house is clean and taking care of the baby!!!!!!!!!!! HOW DARE ME!!!

OK, sorry I had to put that out there, cause I really try hard and I finally in years think I am a good mother......We don't have her trying to kill the baby anymore, I don't have her telling me she wants to chop me up in pieces just to see me die... We actually like in a very chaotic house but not a dangerous chaotic house and it is AWESOME!!!

I have made huge improvements with her and she has made them as well.... But one thing that needs to be realized is Samarra is unique in how she handles stress and emotions and daily living has more issues and stress than fun vacations do.


So like I said.. "Santa" is insane and so you know I am saying who is really insane here lololol

Why the heck in my little cubicle of a house did "santa" get a pop up play house with two full rooms that are 5 feet tall and came with a refigerator, oven and a toy box!!!

WHAT THE HECK??????? this this is sooooooooo massive that MY OCD kicked in to HIGH and beyond as soon as it set up I actually have to go through the dang house to go to the back of the house!!!!!!!!!!!

Kids love it...........MOM DOES NOT!! Ok...ok.... just alittle I do, I think I spent more time in the house than i did outside the day I set it up.. AND guess what???

I have all 4 girls tonight and I already promised I would put it up !!!!!!!!!!!! So I am going home early to get it set up just perfect and I am going to make pop corn and goodies and have dinner ready when they come home and HOPEFULLY they will play all night and I will not stress!!!

Sounds great right.. my plan to control 4 girls all night.........lolol  Hey I can dream cant I??????   hahahahaha

I need help!!!!!!!!!! Please pray for me.. these girls get my OCD going STRONG!!!!! It is the kind where I have to put put on work out clothes and the hair goes up like I am a sumo wrestler to keep from sweating kind!!!

Just a tip to other parents... A toy should NOT make you have to plan what goes in what room prior to opening it!!!!!!!!! lolololol

What if I forget to put something on one side.. I will have to go in the house to get through........Oh and no water for me! lolol OH well I am sure they will have fun... I might go insane.. but who cares about that lolol I will take pics of it so you can see....

Those of you who might have OCD you might not want to look at photos when I post them!!!!

I been lazy and didn't take any new pics, but I took the cutest video of Siahna trying to pretend she is a horse lol So that is what I will post= )

OK Three videos... YAY!!!

1. Siahna kinda singing Jingle Bells and pickin her nose lolol
Siahna Picken and Singing

2. Siahna being a horsey!!!  LOL she is trying so hard and it looks so funny!!!  lolol
Siahna being a horsey 

3. Siahna throwing a bean bag... YES, she got her pants off again!!!!!!!! lolol
Siahna throwing bean bag.

Have an AWESOME DAY!!!!

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Aspergers?? ODD... Christmas photo album And I am thankful the CHAOS is back!!

Good Wednesday to ya!!!

 And now the countdown!!!

This is going to be a short one, but full of pics!!! I did not realize just how much I move in my house until Samarra was gone and came back!!!!!!!!! LOLOL And guess what else I realized!!!!!!!!!!! My OCD is worse when she is home, so I move more OBVIOUSLY... lol

I am so glad my CHAOS is back to normal.... I am pretty sure with out Samarra i would be a fat pig on the couch all the time.. almost anyway... Thank you my Love Bug for my daily work out!!!! I love my girls so much!!

And like I said before and I will say many more times.. God chose her for me..And why???? Well cause I CANT STAND quiet for too long! He fixed that problem of mine.. Thank you GOD!!! lololol For real though when it is quiet around me, it is like there is a freakin symphony in my ears ringing and it drives me INSANE!!!!!!!! Like if I could request specific songs, it would be awesome!! lolol  BUT NO.. just ring ring... GRRRRRRRR So I have noise of some kind all the time, I even sleep to a box fan cause it is loud= )

Ok, enough about my inner ear lol

Lets get to the pics!! 
See I can be sad and cute!!!
This is serious business mom!!!

Patiently waiting............

Got the present and she kept asking if she could "Wip it"  lolol (Rip it)

Samarra ... um being a dog???  lol She was feeding a neighbor dog of my sisters in Florida= )

OK.........Well weird Santa.. and Samarra dressed weird......Perfect= )

Samarra over at a friend of my sisters in Florida with all the kids= )

Lovin the Aquadoodle

Getting good at this wippin stuff.... lolol

Once again.. this is serious.. quit takin pics!  NO CHEESE FACE!

Cousin Destiny and Siahna

LaLa Loopsy.. lovin it= )

What is Christmas with out.. Blanky.....Juice.....Moose.... Sausage.... and waffles!
Uncle Paul and Samarra on Harley in Florida

My sister, DeAnn and her friend Terra at DeAnn's graduation!!!  YEA.. I think I spelled Terra wrong???

My sister, DeAnn and my brother-in-law Paul at my sisters graduation.

Samarra and her new bestie at my sisters graduation!!

Have an awesome day!!

Thursday, December 22, 2011

Aspergers?? ODD... Samarra gone.. Why do I not like the calmness?? SAD! Dec.22, 2011

Thursday REALLY??? 

Yes, I know I have been slackin on writing and trust me........I regret it. I just don't feel like myself!!! 

BUT I have an AWESOME sub-human Jalaine who I would NEVER give up for anything! If you don't have someone you can call and tell EVERYTHING to and they love you just as much..........GET ONE!!! I love her!!

So I am sad..... I mean like I am smiling cause I hate spreading sadness to others which it is I believe to be the # 1 most catchy thing in the world.........But my baby is gone to Florida until the day after Christmas........It has nothing to do with Christmas, to me it is just another day and I am not one to wait for special occasions to show love or give my daughters things= ) But my sadness comes from her not being around me..

YES YES I know we have some CRAZY distressing times, and I get worn out, but you know......I always wondered what "MY PURPOSE" was on this earth, and I am not sure but I think now it may be that I am here for Samarra..........My beautiful baby girl...It is like my house is quiet and She did not run up to me when I got home and attack me and ask if dinner was ready cause you know she has to eat by 5:30 or she will continue to try and drive me to the point of blowing up myself until she is eating.

BUT I missed it.......What the heck is wrong with me??? Well, duh, she is my baby and i miss her, but it feels like more than that..............OH WELL.......... GET OVER IT!!!

But she has been being so funny, I know she was a bit nervous about the flight, but she is an amazing little girl.. She had decided that she was going to die on the plane and she had decided she was ok with it. How does one do that?? She just prayed at night.. She said one night.. "Jesus, Please help Mimi and I go to heaven when we die on Wed." Another one was..."Jesus I love you and I will see you on Wed. and help mommie not to be sad and help sissy grow up happy"

Like i just let her say what she is going to say cause I am not going to entertain a conversation of death and it is kinda cute, but now that I am sad she is gone, it kinda just made me tear up......So i better quit talkin about it...= )

But, I talked to her like 4 times yesterday and she was so excited.. she got two window seats and mom said she must have put the blind up and down 200 times lol and she did start to loose it quite a few times because she didn't like the pressure change in the cabin and kicked and started to freak a bit and lay on mom and kick.. but poor baby just was uncomfortable, but my mother who I would be nothing with out her when it comes to being a mother is a GOD send to me and she is sometimes better with her than I am .......It is amazing how someone can be so God gifted with the ability to take care of children and actually love it!! I love you mom!!

To talk to Samarra she will tell you it was awesome!! She says MOM!!! I walk on air and went to the bathroom !!! And I was high up with the birds and the ducks! She says to me before she left she hoped she would feel closer to Jesus and maybe even see where he lives cause it just doesn't make sense that someone could live up there  lololol...Remember if she doesn't see it, it doesn't exist to her= )    AWWWWWW

Ya know it is not her fault she has issues with aspergers and oppositional defiant disorder and she can be so out of control one second and turn on a dime and be so sweet......But you have to see that even in all of it, she is so sweet and loving and others just dont get it. I am truly blessed cause some children with autism are on the opposite end of the spectrum and they are not able to show love.. and even though we are adults we NEED to feel loved by our kids and we learn what they are doing for love and well.. Samarra shows love in a some what violent approach, but I know she loves me and I am thankful!

So, I guess I better finish to go to work... And I will smile and wait until my holy terror comes home.. lolol But Siahna and I have been playin good and she makes me just as happy so I do have some pictures to share..= )

Gotta smile bigger= )

WOW.. bad hair day!!


Well you got to learn to use the potty right ya know...  lolol


Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Aspergers?? ODD!! OK, I am a bad parent.and dinosaurs are extinct! Dec. 13, 2011

Happy Tuesday!!!

And the countdown is still on!!! 12 days left!!!!!

Where did this year go!!!!! I know one thing... This blog has helped me through part of it!!!!

So I will just get right into this today..........Yes, it is true.. I am a bad parent... WHY??? Well Samarra acts so "odd" at times that I find myself just staring at her and thinking that is the ugliest face I think i have seen or thinking she is so weird! lolol I feel so horrible about it, but then I think I hope she does not ever do this in public........lolol OK criticize me now...lolol I mean she is beautiful, but seriously if you could see her when she is going into a complete melt down or she gets over excited. She is so funny!!!

Just imagine know those older toys where there is a string on the top and bottom on a wooden clown or Santa or something and you pull the strings and it makes the arms and legs jump up and down............THAT IS SAMARRA!!! Somehow this child defies gravity during these times........lololololol Here is a child that cant even jump to jump over a piece of sand and walks in the house with such a hard step it sounds like a herd is on a stampede through it!

I am CONSTANTLY telling her to not stomp when she walks, like she has brick feet or something! But yet she somehow manages to look like a wild woman doing some kind of African native dance when she gets all excited and the faces.....OMGosh lololol I am so going to have to make it a goal to try and record this!!!!!!!! lololol

Don't read me wrong, I love her with all my heart, she just is better than TV sometimes lolol

So you know, she is still doing very well and is very into being just as sweet as can be.........AS LONG AS..........I do not mess up her routines........So what she has routines, so do it.. Just try and mess mine up, I will scratch your eyes out! I will let her have her routines and keep peace..........We have now went I think 2 weeks with no death threats and bodily harm!!!!!!!!!........And you know what? I will take it!!!!!!

YAY Samarra.........YAY me!!! I am so awesome lolol Well someone has to say it lolol

I got dressed already for today and like always Samarra is eating at promptly 6 a.m. and I walk by her and she says to wore that outfit last week on that going to be your Tuesday outfit now...You know people will start to notice it......UGGGG I almost changed cause I really don't like wearing things over, but I am PO!!! lolol I was no, it is clean so I put it on.........She says. I am just saying mom, you wore it last Tuesday and proceeded to tell me what I wore Wed., Thurs., and Friday......I said.. Thank you miss memory....She said.. your jealous.... lolololol She is right.. I wish I could do that!

Samarra has not talked much about the trip to Florida except I can tell she has anxiety cause she keeps asking if she has to go...........and I just say .. nope and we go on........She is however trying to call everyone and plan how things will work..........The other day i was on the bed and she came CHARGING in to the room and grabbed the door jam and said MOM!!!!!!! I said WHAT??? adrenaline all pumping and she says......Don't forget to put deodorant on???????????

WHAT THE???????

I am like why?????? I thought she meant me........She said UM do you want me to stink in Florida????? lololol

I am about in the middle of a heart attack cause of her entrance into the room, I say.. You bout scared me to death!!!!!! She says.....Wait till after I am packed for Florida please............. WOW thanks!

Well i guess I better get the baby, so I will be back soon....= )

I took some pics this weekend and one of them was us playing with play-doh. I made some dinosaur prints and I was playing with Siahna and I said.... Siahna did you see that??? A dinosaur just ran through my play-doh and out the front door!!!
Samarra do know Dinosaurs are extinct right?

I mean really what do you say now? The thing is........ Of course they are.......but for her to say that to me, she actually would have to think I am stupid enough to not know that...........lololololol.. Me stupid momma lololol

Girls eatin breakfast on Sat morning watchin cartoons= )
Look what I made!!!

Grandpa and Samarra= )   AWWW

UM.. me.. lol

Dinosaur prints!!!  lololol

Samarra tickling Siahna

Siahna cracks me up!!!!!  She does the funniest things in her bed..........this time she woke up and decided to wrap up lookin so cute.. singing the Barney song........She sings it ....Luz you happy fimly... AWWW

Siahna and Nanna playin with play-doh

Have an awesome day!!!

Friday, December 9, 2011

Aspergers?? ODD The only thing missing was the drop down airbag!... Dec. 9, 2011

Good Morning and HAPPY FRIDAY!!!

So Yesterday.. I am sitting at my desk, I know the window washer is coming down building... This guy is singing at the top of his lungs something about always being a country boy.....  LOLOL  I had to take a pic.....

SOOOOOOOOOOOO We went to therapy yesterday and two major things happened. Well you know how kids moods are kinda up and down and you love it when there up and you no likey when they are down???

WELL.............I NO LIKEY EITHER!!!!! lololol

Ok, I do like the up more= ) So take a child and pump them with adrenaline and little control of emotional reactions to situations and that is the recipe for Samarra........lololol

So yesterday was the last day for Samarra to see her therapist and the therapist reminded her about it... This really is a good opportunity to work on anger which we did......Samarra was NOT HAPPY! Pretty sure that is why therapist have small rooms in which therapy takes place, less mess when a patient goes psycho mad on them... She was so mad......Saying things like you cant leave me and banging the desk and flaring about..... I really got to hand it to therapist!!!!! Some are awesome, some are ewey! But the ones we go to are AWESOME!!! So sad to see her leave.

So we start with the MAD emotion........Well the therapist has been working with Samarra on "space" and personal bubbles. Samarra has a VERY intrusive way of showing affection and to people she probably doesn't need to.......

Example: When you go to hug someone to say hi or bye........You go in for hug you stay like 1 or 2 seconds and you release..........If it is an emotional meeting you may go in for hug.. stay 5 seconds maybe 10 longest and then you move back..

Samarra.........Goes in for hug.................and you have to start prying her off like 15 seconds in most people cant even take it that long...... and the more you pry the harder she tries to stay....... and it isn't just a hug, it is a tight squeeze and a lot of times jumpin with excitement......... Then with family.. the kisses start and she kisses like 20 times or more all over my face all the while hugging me....... and YES, I am her momma and I love her hugs and kisses!!


Just cause I am a mommy doesn't mean I don't need to breath and have a little bubble!!!!!!!! I like bubbles!!!!!! lololol


My point in all that is.... when she was in her MAD state at the therapist I chose to tell her she was going to Florida with her Mimi for Christmas to see my sister graduate..........She went from MAD TO OVER EXCITED in 2.2 flat!!!!!! lolol

And as I predicted to the therapist, she flipped the heck out!!! It is always amazing how seeing is so much better than hearing.......That girl almost knocked me over coming at me!!!!!!! I am pretty sure I looked scared.........I had my arms out, I was braced for impact..........the only thing I was missing was a drop down air bag!!!!! lololol

So the therapy session went real well, we used BOTH scenarios for role playing... lolol Will it stop?? UM, no.. BUT I need to be better in "COACHING" in the moment.......Therapist says even in public I need to become more of a coach to help her realize the proper ways to be social and interact.....She did say I must do this discreetly as possible so Samarra does not get embarrassed by me doing it out in public. She says just a simple wisper will help.......SOOOOOOOO guess what..........More learning for me....

Have you ever watched "The Big Bang Theory?" Even if you don't keep watching it, Seriously, Samarra is a small Sheldon on that cracks me up!!!!! OH, not a show for kids...

So now Samarra knows and the questions have started, I am going to try and keep a log of the questions over the weekend and I will share them with you....

This is one already....

Samarra.......We NEED to go to an airplane shop and buy Mimi and I parachutes for our plane ride, so if we go down we will live.......
Me....well what about everyone else??
Samarra....UM, they should have been smart enough to bring a parachute.. I cant save the world mom....

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL I just left it alone........ lolol

Samarra chillin
Still thinks "fart" is the funniest word....... lol......
I raise such ladies... lolol

Well Have a GREAT FRIDAY.......and Weekend!!!

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Aspergers?? ODD...Brrrrrrrrr its cold!!! Is Santa British?? Dec.8, 2011

Happy Wednesday!!!

Yes, I am on the potty........AND????  I am cute on here too= ) 
It was cute I tried to get her to say toilet.. and she says...No tuulets....potty!  lol

Jingle Bells......Jingle Bells........Jingle all the way......Oh what fun it is to ride in a one horse open sleigh HEY! Sorry ....lolol The song is stuck in my head and I even dreamed it!!!!!!!! I thought maybe if I wrote it down it would go away...........NOPE didn't

Soooooooooo either God has done a major divine intervention or maybe I have been doing a great job at working with Samarra this last few days or so........You know there was ZERO drama at the house last night except Siahna being tired..........BUT!!!!!!!! Samarra actually jumped in and was trying to help her be happy........Samarra has a look of panic on her face while trying and she starts to freak out a bit and says things like...........MOM... It's NOT working what do I do???? With the deer in headlights look...lolol... But she tried something else!!!

But this is amazing! I am pretty sure it is the divine intervention though lolol Cause I was a bit stressed out yesterday myself.......Samarra does tend to remind me and want praise for being so good lately.. which of course I give it to her= )

BUT...........Does this mean there is an hidden motive??? I wonder what it could be??? See I shouldn't think like that..........But man do I know her well.....Something is coming............OH wait.. maybe it is because Santa is coming!!!! She has said a few times she is worried she wont get anything cause her emotions are hard and she is bad....... I just have been reassuring her she is NOT "bad" she just has things she needs to work on more...... I HATE when parents allow their kids to think they are BAD............They are NOT bad, their actions are what is bad....


The only thing that went on is Samarra seems to be overly excited about Christmas and she just HAS to go crazy with it... She is not being bad, but she intrudes in my space when she gets so excited, like hugging me very tight and not letting go and getting in my face and kissing me all over to the point where I cant breath.. and she "pats" me which hurts bad!! So even though she is not being "bad" I still have to get a bit crazy momma on her to get her off me... I think I am a bit claustrophobic or something cause I cant breath!!!

But I guess if she is going to do it to someone.. why not me..lolol I can take the bruises... hahahah........ But I must teach her not to do this to others!!

She was on a thought kick last night and she says.....

In a British accent she says.........I think Santa is British or he learned to speak it while giving presents out, cause I am almost positive when I saw him the other day he said.......iPod.. but Britishly......... lolol It was so cute and funny sounding.

Then she goes off on some rant about molecules and cold weather and it being cold on the moon and why............NONE of it made sense at all to me and she says to me.Mom do you understand that?? Well, I did not have an answer so I just said... Honey I am sure that is very scientific and factual but no, I don't get it..........But I do know the moon is cold, so they say and then she says well it is because and then goes off on the molecules represent this and that.. blah blah... lolol So it is at these times I wonder if she is just logically coming to a conclusion even if it might not be true, or if I am just so ignorant that I don't know.........

Like I said before.. should I need the internet to understand her??? lolololol

Oh another cute thing she said the day before.... My dad has written quite a few books and she decided she was going to take one to school and show off a bit and the book she chose had 100 pages in it, but the 100th page had no typing on it just a "100" She says to me..........Well I guess he ran out of things to say so he just put a "100" on there and left it.... lolol

Anyway..........I am THANKFUL for no drama or anyone getting hurt!!! And I am going to think positive that this is how it will be forever going forward!!!!!!!!

OH..........wish me luck.. I will be telling Samarra she is going to Florida for Christmas this weekend I think!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Lord help me!!! And hope no one gets hurt in the process!!!!!!!

Also She is going to be in a national spelling bee in a few weeks as well!!!!!!! I think I might have a champion here.........But then she says......I already know I am smarter than all of them, why do I need to prove it.......I am going to let someone else win so they can think they are smart since I don't need to know I am .. I just am.............GRRRRRRR she better not blow it on purpose!!!

I didn't load up on pics last night = ( ...But I still have great oldies!!!  I love looking at them!!

I don't know if anyone else does this, but I look at my girls and just am amazed how God put us together and just how beautiful and unique they are... Amazing.

Samarra with my dad, Richard Hardin,  who wrote the book she is so proud of = )

I got a rock..... Kids are amused by such small things  lol aww

YUP, Cute.. I am never a problem  lolol


Have a great day!!!

Monday, December 5, 2011

Aspergers?? ODD... Stick to real things mom.. like Santa... lol Dec. 5, 2011

Happy 16 more days till Christmas!!
OH, and Monday

At the OPUBCO Christmas party for the girls.....

Can I say that I think ONCE again that I think I may be the problem instead of Samarra, or rather her issues spawn from me?? My routine got jacked up this weekend and I did NOT like it!!!!!!!!!!! I was CRANKY!!! My mom knows, she was with me.. lolol But, as the adult I am and wish I wasn't at times, I recognized my cranky and dislike of the situation and verbalized it and moved on! Maybe I should try having a meltdown sometimes, maybe it is a mind cleanser.. lolol

Even with all the holiday buzz going on this weekend, I can say it was pretty good. We ALMOST had our first meltdown in public and I am not even sure why... I am almost 100% positive it was because a baby was crying.......There was a baby crying near us and Samarra I think got set off a bit and started grabbing her ears and quinching her eyes and she backed herself up to a wall and was rocking.

I just STOPPED and thought.............NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And I looked at her and I said......This will NOT happen here! Put your arms down and lets walk away......... I took a hold of her arm and she kinda growled at me and yanked it away hard and right back to her ears..........The baby quit crying and she just stopped.......... I knew a long time ago babies crying set her off, but I thought it was just Siahna...........GUESS NOT.......... But Really, that is not a meltdown really, She has sensitivity issues and it is not her fault. She has told me many times that she does that cause it hurts her ears BAD.... When she had her hearing tested, she hears some frequencies better than most people do.........So, poor baby= (

OK, so I know you are anxiously awaiting to hear about what #2 meltdown from last week was.................WELL, if you follow my blog, this will need NO explanation at all...........Samarra's therapist is moving to Florida permanently and she just found out Thursday.......... ENOUGH SAID??


She seemed ok with it at first, you know the 100 questions for her therapist and telling her it was ok, as long as she comes back every week to see her.......lolol
So we leave and all seems ok, she is still talking about it and then it hits.......She is MAD, screaming "YOU CANT LEAVE ME"........"YOU CANT LEAVE ME!"........Crying, screaming,flaring about and she decides she is going to go with her to Florida..........Apparently the therapist life is suppose to revolve around her as is everyone else.........Remember, it is all about her= )..So this was fun for me, I was a bit shaken by this one, or I was cold........NOT SURE lolol

But like starts with a vengeance and ends as though nothing happened. I will probably never get used to that, but positive thing is.. it is usually over after that........We will see how it goes this Thursday.

Once again I have to point out this was not her acting bad, this was a case of her not being able to handle emotions.....She has been VERY good with the obedience and following through on tasks to get stars and more times than not she is saying yes ma'am, and no ma'am, and offering to help me.....Playing with her sister......So what if it is to get stars......She is a good girl.......Now if I can help her learn to deal with emotions.

OMGosh... I am NOT looking forward to hormone changes..........LAWD help me!!!


So this weekend we went to my work for the Christmas party for the kids.......They always do a great job with it and the girls were so excited to see SANTA!!!
Samarra is convinced the ONLY real Santa is the one at my work...........AAAAWWWWWWWW I am just so happy that she believes in him still. Siahna just kept saying Santa.. Santa.. candy cane... candy cane... AAAAAAWWWWWWWWWW

We also went to Samarra's choir performance at was so good= ) I took pictures and will share= ) Oh and went to Cici's pizza.........YAY!!! lolol

My beauties in front of the Christmas tree at OPUBCO

Samarra doing a craft at the OPUBCO party

This IS the real SANTA!!! She said she wanted to go on the roof to watch him come in !!!!   I have to tell you this makes me so happy for her to believe when all the rest of the time she goes by facts!

My mommy and Siahna doing a craft...........You know you have to have your tongue just right to color!!!

I am NOT getting any closer to you... Just give me my candy cane!  lololol
YUMMY noodles!!

Miss picky............not eating..
Samarra in the Christmas program at Meadowood Baptist Church in MWC.  

 Siahna wanted to vacuum so bad this weekend so I let her... lol I got a video!!  It is so cute!!!

The video is sideways???  Still cute!!

Have an AWESOME DAY!!!!!!

Friday, December 2, 2011

Aspergers...ODD... OMGosh I missed you blog!! Dec. 2, 2011

Happy Friday!!

I am SOOOOOOOOOOOO glad it is the weekend!!!!

OK, So this week has been UGGGGGGGGGGGG. So I wrote on Monday I think.. And since then, i have had to take the baby to the hospital for a fall, Samarra has had two MASSIVE MASSIVE meltdowns, I had SIX and i will repeat SIX shots in my back, The house alarm decided to go nuts in the middle of the night and I have been BUSY!!!!

So my insides feel kinda like mush being held together by adrenaline and electrical current!!!!!!!

I have a twitch in my eye, my leg is twitching, I am wired like no other, hands shaking and everything is fine right now. CRAZY!! Maybe it is the start of ZOMBIEISM!!!!!!! Thank God my sub-human likes zombies, she can keep me in her basement as a pet lolol Love ya Jaline!! OMGosh and she told me the funniest story last night BHAAAAA!!!!!!!!! She goes to a new wave tanning salon with a bed that scans you to make sure you don't burn.. They forgot to tell her it sprays water at her while she is in it!!!!!!!!!!!! LOLOLOLOLOLOL I SOOOOO wished that was on video.. minus the no clothing thing lolololol I was ROLLIN!

OK, so anyway... Jus tlike all babies, Siahna fell and just happen to meet the door jam to her room with her head..........this thing grew the zice of a chicken egg like in 2.2 seconds and it was dark purple instantly...... I stayed calm but freakin on the inside......And THEN Samarra went into a meltdown!!!!!! She is screaming as loud as she can into a blanket.

SHE IS GOING TO DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! She repeats this over and over as she is wailing about and I try to tell her she is not going to die and she gets mean sounding and saying YES SHE IS!!!!!!!!!! CALL MIMI So she can say goodbye to her!!!!!!! 

Can you tell she DOES NOT handle emotional things well???

I am trying to put an ice pack on her head and calm Siahna and Samarra is out of control.. I really tried not to call mom this time, but I had to.........So mom comes over and Samarra is still screaming.......I lost time at this point I am not sure when Siahna stopped crying but Samarra did not, but I knew I HAD to get Siahna checked or I was not going to be able to let her sleep....So mom and I went and Samarra stayed with her dad......... Well this all started about 6:30........I call to check on Samarra at 8:15 and she is still crying and freakin out........ Well we got done and home by 9:00 and Samarra is passed out, face swollen up!!!!!!

OK, check this out.. the doctor says, she is fine, BUT if you cant wake her up in the morning take her strait to the ER............UMMMMMMMMMM WHAT THE??????? OH Yeah that is going to help me sleep!! So the night consisted of me looking at her like every 15 min to see if she was moving lolol She is fine... I tool a pic, but only the next day so it doesn't look near as bad.......Yes, i was a good mommie and didn't make her pose for a pic during the ordeal lololol

OK, Well I still have # 2 MELTDOWN to tell you about, but I need to get ready for work= ( So stay tuned for the next one........Reminded me of Max off the show "Parenthood" except that is a tv show and the show can only last so long.. lolol

We did manage to get in seeing the lights by our house as well and I took some pics of that too= )

OH and I am a bad mom for this...........I planned for Samarra to go to Nanna's for tonight! I need a break! I did not tell her or she would have got too excited, so they get to deal with letting her know her schedule is going to change......... I know it is wrong But funny kinda....lolol Besides she loves going over there!

Samarra and Siahna Christmas 2010  AWWWW

Samarra Christmas 2009 She looks so tiny! 
Me about to loose it.......although you cant tell...

Siahna's poor head= (
And now lights!!!
OK, is it just me or does it look like Santa is whippin someone in this picture???  lolololol

Siahna's favorite

My favorite= )

Samarra's favorite= )
Have a Great Friday !!!!!!!!!!