Aspergers Mommy

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Well I am a mom of two wonderful kids that I have been blessed with!!! I am not a psychiatrist, or a doctor so anything I say is not the answer to all, it might not even be the right thing for me!! lol I do my best with who and what I have to overcome any challenge with lots and lots of prayer,my mom who is God given just to me for this very reason, my sisters, and friends! I love life, mostly positive........BUT I am insane at times, get to the point of wanting to explode! lol.. I sing kids songs way too much! Did I mention I am OCD when it comes to cleaning. Which believe it or not I think is what keeps me sane. When I clean, I love it. Breakdowns, crying, talking, just all seem to be ok as I clean..Thank God for OCD!!!

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Aspergers?? ODD... I am BACK!!!! It was like a BLOOD BATH!!! Oct. 25, 2011

Happy Tuesday again!!!



WOW!!!!!!!!! It has been since last Tuesday since I was able to write on here.......OK, this is what happened..............LIFE!!!!

UGGGG but why did so much life have to happen at one time???

Lets see if I can sum this up....Fall break......An employee had a medical issue come up with family and did not work........other employees off for Fall break.........5 doctors appt. for various things......I am sure there is more, but i lost it in the brain somewhere!

So it is still busy, but I had a moment to breath........Although it has been busy, at least everyone is well and happy= )

So I am going to focus on one subject today.. the thing that has me most aggrevated lately......I dont think Samarra can EVER be happy..... I seriously am at a loss....I dont know what to do and I need help from anyone!!!

THE MORE YOU GIVE OR DO THE MORE SHE WANTS!!!!!!!!!

Yea, ok that is normal behavior to a POINT with most kids......BUT like I say.. Samarra is "TO THE EXTREME" with everything........

So family dinner at my place on Friday night, then I let her go to her cousins to sleep over.... She did not even come back until 6:30 the next night....

NO I LOVE YOU..............NO HI.............NO I MISSED YOU...........

She walks in crying and flaring about and saying things like her life is horrible and no one ever lets her do anything and she wants to go back with her cousins.. I had to practically drag her in the door!!!!!!

WHAT THE HECK IS THAT???????? I KNOW if I had not let her go she would have complained a bit, but nothing even this close.... Well, I just ignored her and told her I loved her and missed her and that sent her into an anger rage.......throwing things........So I snapped a bit and said...........

Sorry MOM and Dad if you read this= )

I said........OH HELL NO!!!!!!! DO IT AGAIN!!!!! DO IT AGAIN.........She just looked at me and it did keep her from throwing, but she was screaming , so I basically dragged her to her room and shut the door.....OH about 10 min later it got quiet and she walked out and said completely normal Whats for dinner.. I missed you mommy....

What the???? Freakin up and down, I do not like this at all! But this always happens when she gets something........the bigger it is, the worse it gets........AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So we proceeded on with the night and she even said herself......I am so tired I don't even know how to control my brain! Like I have said a billion times.. tired and Samarra don't mix!

Ok, this is my blog and I can write what I want and I want to say with honestly............I LOVE SAMARRA!!!!!!!!!!! But when things like this happen I just wish she had not come home for a moment.= ( I don't mean I don't ever want her there, I just want so bad for a time when I get home, or she comes back home and shows some loving acknowledgement toward me or anyone really..... I know it is hard for her to having to try and sort emotions and try to show the right responses to different emotions, but DANGIT it is hard for me to!

We will get there I KNOW IT!!! But I will never make it with out God!!!!! She is already perfect to him= ) She is 7, I still have time= )

OH I missed you blog.. I needed to write.........

Here are some pics... YAY!!
Siahna was still amazed at the elephant at the zoo that squished a pumpkin and ate it..... I took a pic of it and she carries it around saying.... "Ephant skish punkin ate all gone"  AWWW  She had to have her safari hat on.. it has an elephant on the front of it  lolol
Safari Siahna

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Sunday the cousins were at my house after church till that night and I got some photos= )
Kara, Siahna, Samarra, and Elizabeth

Playing freeze tag= )

Kara

Samarra trying to pose= )

My first attempt at a picture with all of them looking at me  lol

 So................. while I went inside for drinks the girls found some RED bubbles an d decided to not blow bubbles but to shake it around so they all looked like the had chicken pox........NICE....  lol  IT LOOKED LIKE A BLOOD BATH!!!
Siahna BEFORE bubble blood bath........Looking beautiful I might add= )
The girls targeted me cause I am little!! It is not my fault= )

And if you wonder, yes, the colored bubbles are truly washable= )  WHEW!
Have a great day!

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