Well I was gone for a few days, I was in the hospital with what I call the wishing someone would kill me headache and food poison. I am pretty sure I was not nice during this time.
So guess what... Samarra's daddy had to get her to school on Tuesday, mom took her Monday I think. I really don't know. Anyway! So I asked her dad if he gave her her medicine, and he says.... No I didn't know what she took, but she was rummaging around in there, maybe she found it. Ok, so if you don't know by now, she is SIX!!!! Why would you let a six year old rummage in a medicine cabinet with all kinds of pills??? Thank God for child proof lids and her inability to even open a bottle of pop!!!!!!!
So I made a realization of MAYBE something Samarra goes through in her daily life. She has an extreme anxiety of being alone. I don't know why but she does and if I leave a room, she will call out my name quite a few times just to hear me respond. Well When i got sick something happened in my brain where I was acting somewhat irritable and uncooperative which is not normal for me at all. The pain was so severe that I literally was loosing bits and pieces of what was going on which was making me freak out.
Well, Samarra does not do that, but once I got to the hospital which my mom and my Brother-in-law took me, i was still in this state and i had a rag over my eyes and any movement was making me be very sick. They found a dark , more quiet place for me to wait and i for a few minutes at a time would be quiet and comfortable. But, I found myself going in and out and my anxiety level was quite high, and I kept calling out for my mom every few minutes. I would say kind of loud.. MOM.. and she would say I am here... then i went back out... then again.. MOM... and then back out...
I think this anxiety I felt at that time could very well be what Samarra feels all the time. I have always been understanding of her, but it does cause aggravation at times. I will make sure I address her anxiety at all times with a very understanding attitude and add more reassurance to her that she will never be left alone. Even at school if the teacher stepped in the hall it sparked crying and panic. I tell everyone where she goes, do not leave the room for even a second, or take her with you.
So I have not had Samarra with me until Tuesday about 5:30 p.m. And yes this is the day Daddy did not give her her medicine. The only description of the evening I can give you is... tornado!!! She was happy and she also did not have any meltdowns THANK GOD! I also tried to make sure the whole evening was dedicated to the girls so this helped. But she was all over the place, running , jumping, talking so fast you couldn't even understand her, and there was no such thing as personal space last night. Unless you see it, you would say that sounds liek a normal child who missed her mom. Well, yes she did, but her strength and aggressiveness comes out full force, I had to get her off the baby 3 times from holding her hand over her mouth and nose so she could see her try to breath. She did it to me, she was running around hitting things and I got hit a few times. doing things like throwing books which she knows not to do. Just destructive all around!
I did not hear how school went, but hopefully they knew I was in the hospital. I did get a note that she was more argumentative and combative...........Well what does that mean??? So I have no idea.
Ok well we started a new day and it will. be great I hope... I still owe you pictures of her awards.. coming soon!
- Info on the insane mom.
- Well I am a mom of two wonderful kids that I have been blessed with!!! I am not a psychiatrist, or a doctor so anything I say is not the answer to all, it might not even be the right thing for me!! lol I do my best with who and what I have to overcome any challenge with lots and lots of prayer,my mom who is God given just to me for this very reason, my sisters, and friends! I love life, mostly positive........BUT I am insane at times, get to the point of wanting to explode! lol.. I sing kids songs way too much! Did I mention I am OCD when it comes to cleaning. Which believe it or not I think is what keeps me sane. When I clean, I love it. Breakdowns, crying, talking, just all seem to be ok as I clean..Thank God for OCD!!!