Aspergers Mommy

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Well I am a mom of two wonderful kids that I have been blessed with!!! I am not a psychiatrist, or a doctor so anything I say is not the answer to all, it might not even be the right thing for me!! lol I do my best with who and what I have to overcome any challenge with lots and lots of prayer,my mom who is God given just to me for this very reason, my sisters, and friends! I love life, mostly positive........BUT I am insane at times, get to the point of wanting to explode! lol.. I sing kids songs way too much! Did I mention I am OCD when it comes to cleaning. Which believe it or not I think is what keeps me sane. When I clean, I love it. Breakdowns, crying, talking, just all seem to be ok as I clean..Thank God for OCD!!!

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Aspergers Barbies, scary magnets, and two meltdowns June 22, 2011

Happy Wednesday!!!!!!!!

So the title pretty much says the blog, but I will add some more details to it...  I have been trying to NOT clean as much and play a bit more and I am making some AMAZING discoveries so I am going to help you parents out or anyone who has ever wondered about some things.

1. If you have girls and a lot of barbies, why are they always naked laying around the house??  Am I the only one who gets a little EW seeing these naked plastic people just in all positions around the house and constantly making sure none are out when people come over?????  I have solved the mystery!  We played barbies last night, well ok I did and just me being in room Samarra does her own thing, she doesn't play WITH me or US.  So here I am dressing barbies. It took me close to 20 minutes to get these skin tight clothes on these things!!!!!!!!  If it took me that long, no wonder they are naked all the time!!!!!!!!!!

Here are the dressed barbies.

Ok now on to another topic.... While I am "playing" I really get to play alone or with the baby as I mentioned. Samarra does not interact well with play things. But she spends her whole time worrying when I am going to get up.. If I move, she starts.. where are you going.. do you need a drink of water , I will get it so you will stay in here... She just sits there with apparently a high anxiety level and doesn't play... Well I am used to it.. Every once in a while she will come over and hug me and tell me she loves me and says she is so happy I am playing with them. OH well as long as she is happy. The baby gets loud playing at times so last night she had to get her headset out to stay in the room. She likes them pretty well, it has become more like a favorite blanky then a headset lol

Yes, you did see that all the blankets and pillows were out again= )

2. I played with, which I have to say is VERY CREAPY!!!!!!!! it is a magnet thing with faces you can put eyes and stuff on...... I might just have nightmares... Who came up with this??  Hey lets make the ugliest people we can and let kids play with them...........

So I really have to get up and do some things..... wait wait.. OK nice, she is ok with it...Whew... Now to get stuff picked up and maybe take a small break....

Meltdown # 1 I go outside, I sit down.........I think i will get a few quiet minutes......... NOPE....
Samarra is at the window BANGING ON IT..........What the??? the window is going to break. Remember I said if you give, she wants more??? Which makes you not want to give just because of that, but I do.. So here it goes.

Samarra: Banging on window motioning for me to come in
Me: Quit banging on window
Samarra: Come in, I want you to come in
Me:Honey I just stepped out here, i will be in in a moment!
Me:You cant count a moment, it isnt a second or a minute.
Samarra:Come in now, I need you in the house
Me:What do you need?
Samarra:Still hitting window hasn't stopped and waving for me to come in. You just need to come in now.
Me: I quit looking at her
Samarra: Looking very very frustrated and mad as ever still knocking on window and repeating come in now, come in, come in, come in, come in.
Me:See mayeb I am wrong, but should I HAVE to stay by her side, she does this when I go to the restroom sometimes, even if i am in there like 5 seconds.
Samarra: Banging on window
Me:Samarra Lindauer..... STOP
Samarra: Crying and all I can say is freaking out, stomping, yelling, flaring...
Me:So now that it has been about 1 minute, I am going in before the window busts...

I walk in the door and she is fine, calm, as nothing happened..... I am still worked up and mad as heck! I ask her why she did that......She says.. I don't like to be left alone.......WOW.... Daddy, Siahna in house, and me on porch with in 10 inches of her on the other side of window. SIGH.......Not her fault really, she cant help her anxiety level, but seriously she has got to learn that she will be ok....... The ONLY reason it happened was because I spend quite a bit of time with her before going out. OK one meltdown over..

So now all is good..... Now it is time to pick up blankets, oh wait... ME pick up blankets, baths, teeth and bed...... Yay! We made it!!!

Samarra wants to play wii............... it doesnt work for some reason.... I checked to make sure plugged in......... Nothing...  NICE.......  So this is one of those things you wish you could fix, but you cant no matter what Samarra may do and this doesnt seem to compute to her at all.... I try to tell her it is broke. she acts as if i just said nothing and says will you put in golf....Samarra, honey it is broke it doesnt work..... Yes it does, it just needs batteries........ No it is broke on the machine, not the remote...............I am going to play.........Honey.. listen to me.. you cant play it, it is not working.............It has always worked before..................Well it doesnt this time I am sorry............It needs to work, it always did before......... So this goes on till she finally blows up and is crying , screaming in pillow hitting her pillow and kicking..........I do try to stop her this time, but it just makes it worse......... I go get ready for bed................... She gets done............INSTANT difference...  well since it is broke, can I play with daddy's phone?

Now ready for bed, playing daddy's phone and happy as ever..........

I wish I understood, but I don't, I wish i didn't get so MAD on the inside, but I do, I wish it was easier for her, but its not. We are who we are and we move on and smile the next day= )

Heads up on tonight, just FYI, She was suppose to go to mall with her aunt, and they cant go.........Sigh........ Could be a good night.. pray it is, but pray for mom more cause she gets to tell her.... I haven't braved the dreaded phone call.............Schedule changes don't work out well...

I will leave you with a cute picture of Siahna with her favorite monkey= )

You can almost see a smile!!!!

Have an AWESOME DAY!!!

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