Aspergers Mommy

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Well I am a mom of two wonderful kids that I have been blessed with!!! I am not a psychiatrist, or a doctor so anything I say is not the answer to all, it might not even be the right thing for me!! lol I do my best with who and what I have to overcome any challenge with lots and lots of prayer,my mom who is God given just to me for this very reason, my sisters, and friends! I love life, mostly positive........BUT I am insane at times, get to the point of wanting to explode! lol.. I sing kids songs way too much! Did I mention I am OCD when it comes to cleaning. Which believe it or not I think is what keeps me sane. When I clean, I love it. Breakdowns, crying, talking, just all seem to be ok as I clean..Thank God for OCD!!!

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Aspergers She loves grilled steak from daddy! June 15, 2011

It's Wednesday! Ok.. Happy ...lol

I don't know, but I am wanting to still be in bed.. no reason, just lazy.... Cool house, cubbers, and old scary movies... PERFECT!

But I will go to work instead, I do love my job too.

So an overall view of yesterday was a pretty good night. I had purchased some chicken, steak and pork chops and daddy cooked it all up at the same time last night...........YAY... Samarra LOVES MEAT when daddy cooks it on the grill. She ate steak, chicken four cheese potato's, broccoli, and she wanted pringles for dessert... Whatever she wants at this point, SHE ATE HER MEAT!!! happy happy!! Of course Siahna eats everything.

One important thing to note about me making Samarra's dinner, I have to cut the meat up even smaller than I cut Siahna's because Samarra either WONT bite, or cant bite... who knows.. but I do all but chew it up and give it back... lolol This is anything that has to be bit off except like bread, she has NO problem eating any bread... Her dinner is also given to her in a bowl, not a plate. A plate is for breakfast. You didn't know that.. well it is a rule.....lol

After dinner I left the house to go and look at garden again and was out there about ..............maybe 4 minutes and i came back in to this....



Samarra had decided to get out all these boxes I had set to go outside and made a boat out of it.... lol Yeah, ok it was a mess, but they were so cute! Played with it for a long time which is great!!!

So far so good.... and I am feeling so much better today.. no tears... yet.. lol

And it is over.. Samarra decides to take the baby in the bedroom... I am listening... waiting... Samarra is laughing.. ok... I don't hear Siahna.............ALARM.......... What are you doing??? Trying to see if Siahna will breath if i bury her in blankets........UGGGG NO!! Honey you cant do that.. she could get hurt! But it is fun... Me: I said STOP and I mean it....Do it again and see what I will do.... She says ok, I wont... I leave.

I hear the door close again, but I hear both of them now so all is good.... Siahna is screaming now.... and Samarra is laughing.... I open the door... what are you doing now??? I turned out the lights so she couldn't see so she would get scared and cry........... Samarra!!..........why would you do that.....She looks at me like I am dumb and says........UMMMMMMMM cause it is fun......... UUUUUGGGGGGGGG

I told you this is scary..... I wonder if other mothers deal with death issues and stuff... Why couldnt she get fixated on cars, or something....But like i said let her sister get hurt even a little and Samarra breaks down hard!

This time I took Siahna out of the room with me. Samarra, can I have a pop-tart... Yes, but give e a sec...AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH what is wrong with me.... Samarra 1. now can I have it? Me: OK, give me a few minutes.... Samarra: that is no more than three you know. She walks off, comes back it has been 2 minutes and 30 seconds.. you have 30 seconds to get the pop-tart, you better get it now.

Yup, I got it....

Had an interesting conversation with Samarra which showed strong asperger traits... Have you ever seen the show "Parenting"? The episode where Max's cousin is in a car wreck and the whole family was suppose to go to the hospital and Max went even though he was suppose to have pancakes?  Well the situation was unstable with the cousin and the family had no news of living of dying. and Max is stressing out about his pancakes and starts saying things like "You said she wasn't going to die anyway so why are we here, I want my pancakes... you said i could have pancakes"  The father tries to calm him, but NO.. with aspergers.. your problems are not there problems and don't inconvenience them with yours.. there life and routine is more important...

So here is the conversation

Samarra: When are you going to get sick again and cry and throw up?
Me: I hope never!
Samarra: I wish you would now
Me: Why
Samarra: Cause it was funny watching you get sick
Me: Really.. you weren't scared at all?
Samarra: Maybe like this much... (puts up her fingers where you could barely see through them)
Me: So you liked it then
Samarra: Yea I loved it
Me: Trying to understand her thoughts I say... And what made it a good time?
Samarra: I got to go to Mimi's house, I got to play games, she made sure my breakfast and lunch and dinner were on time
Me: So it wasn't that mommy was sick , it is because Mimi keeps better track of time?
Samarra: No you being sick cracked me up a lot, I thought i was going to die laughing...
Me: Thanks babe
Samarra: Well i do like going to the cafeteria at the hospital
Me: I know you do..
Samarra: So will you get sick again please, so I can eat in the cafeteria?
Me: You are crazy and no.

Do you see how everything is about her and not the situation?  So if we are ever around you and your sick, please know it is about her in her head and if she says something inappropriate, well........I don't want to say I will apologize, but just understand her= )  She really does love hard and she just cant help it.

The rest of the night pretty much went off with out any issues. Got the girls in bed and I watched TV and I am not sure when I fell asleep....

OH, Samarra has been wearing her headset quite a bit, she likes them... I even put them on for a bit last night  lol  I loved them.. I couldn't hear anything!   lol

Here they are.

No one died, I didn't cry, House is still standing.........AMEN!

Happy Wednesday!!!!!!

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